Its been a rough couple of weeks. I had the flu. It was bad. and long. I slept. a lot.
My kids survived because I locked the doors left a bunch of crackers and water out on the dining room table and gave them an all access pass to watch TV.
I slept for an entire weekend. That is not an exaggeration. My husband thought it would be cute to take a picture of me sleeping. Its not cute.
(I can't believe I posted that.)
The kids wore the same clothes (or lack of clothes) for a few days
The laundry piled up.
My husband wants to name the laundry pile because "something that large deserves a name"
I pointed out it was only so large because it was in a pile on the floor instead of in the laundry basket, which was still full with the clean laundry from Friday.
He pointed out that clean laundry was from the Friday two weeks ago. Touche.
The kids have started saying 'that's whack' thanks to their father being the only non-delirious adult in the house.
me: Please clean up your toys.
the boys: Mom, that's whack.
The chickens have learned they can fly over the fence.
Perhaps they overheard my telling the neighbor that the fence was only a "suggestion of boundaries" when he asked me how we got them to stay in there.
Loose chickens = me wandering the yard in my pajamas shooing chickens.
I see my neighbors staring but when I give them a wave they suddenly turn the other way and are busy tending to their yard. car. shoes.
I'm pretty sure they all think I'm either on crack or on a psychotic break.
This illness all started after I did a majorspring fall cleaning. With the cool weather we turned the ceiling fans off for the first time in months.
That's when I noticed the two inches of dust on the ceiling fans. Which led to a four hour cleaning binge of all dust covered surfaces. Which led to a chest cold, then bronchitis and the flu.
There is a lesson here.
Cleaning is bad for your health.
Bad health leads to household chaos.
There is so much more ridiculousness that has happened these past two weeks but I was medicated so I'm not sure I could accurately recall it.
Apparently the Universe decided I needed a little something to make me laugh. So when the chickens escaped again this morning and a squirrel moved in on the coop (it happens often) I closed the coop door and declared we now had a pet squirrel.
The squirrel, so excited to be our new pet and wanting to show off its amazing pet tricks, started flying from wall to wall, climbing the mesh walls in frenzied circles, and running around bouncing off everything.
Very chaotic.
I did not need any additional chaos so I opened the door and the squirrel reluctantly left. Well reluctantly left in a mad dash. I can only assume it was his last attempt at trying to impress us with his awesome pet potential.
I did get video. Though I was too awestruck by him walking on the walls to remember I had my cell phone in hand. That was some mad squirrel skills. My apologies that you will never see it. But lucky you I have one minute + of our almost-pet squirrel to share with you... enjoy
and you're welcome. :)
And for anyone concerned: I'm feeling better, the boys have had vegetables, protein, and dairy added back in to their diets, the laundry is being tackled. However, the boys still say that's whack and the chickens still escape daily.
My kids survived because I locked the doors left a bunch of crackers and water out on the dining room table and gave them an all access pass to watch TV.
I slept for an entire weekend. That is not an exaggeration. My husband thought it would be cute to take a picture of me sleeping. Its not cute.
The kids wore the same clothes (or lack of clothes) for a few days
The laundry piled up.
My husband wants to name the laundry pile because "something that large deserves a name"
I pointed out it was only so large because it was in a pile on the floor instead of in the laundry basket, which was still full with the clean laundry from Friday.
He pointed out that clean laundry was from the Friday two weeks ago. Touche.
I refuse to post a picture of the laundry pile (aka Mount Kilimanjaro)
use your imagination.
The kids have started saying 'that's whack' thanks to their father being the only non-delirious adult in the house.
me: Please clean up your toys.
the boys: Mom, that's whack.
The chickens have learned they can fly over the fence.
Perhaps they overheard my telling the neighbor that the fence was only a "suggestion of boundaries" when he asked me how we got them to stay in there.
Loose chickens = me wandering the yard in my pajamas shooing chickens.
I see my neighbors staring but when I give them a wave they suddenly turn the other way and are busy tending to their yard. car. shoes.
I'm pretty sure they all think I'm either on crack or on a psychotic break.
This illness all started after I did a major
That's when I noticed the two inches of dust on the ceiling fans. Which led to a four hour cleaning binge of all dust covered surfaces. Which led to a chest cold, then bronchitis and the flu.
There is a lesson here.
Cleaning is bad for your health.
Bad health leads to household chaos.
There is so much more ridiculousness that has happened these past two weeks but I was medicated so I'm not sure I could accurately recall it.
Apparently the Universe decided I needed a little something to make me laugh. So when the chickens escaped again this morning and a squirrel moved in on the coop (it happens often) I closed the coop door and declared we now had a pet squirrel.
The squirrel, so excited to be our new pet and wanting to show off its amazing pet tricks, started flying from wall to wall, climbing the mesh walls in frenzied circles, and running around bouncing off everything.
Very chaotic.
I did not need any additional chaos so I opened the door and the squirrel reluctantly left. Well reluctantly left in a mad dash. I can only assume it was his last attempt at trying to impress us with his awesome pet potential.
I did get video. Though I was too awestruck by him walking on the walls to remember I had my cell phone in hand. That was some mad squirrel skills. My apologies that you will never see it. But lucky you I have one minute + of our almost-pet squirrel to share with you... enjoy
and you're welcome. :)
And for anyone concerned: I'm feeling better, the boys have had vegetables, protein, and dairy added back in to their diets, the laundry is being tackled. However, the boys still say that's whack and the chickens still escape daily.
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